WHAT IS BETRAYAL
Have you been betrayed or someone you know. Anyone is vulnerable to being betrayed either form a boyfriend, husband, friends, family or even work colleagues. Either way, no matter who has betrayed you it hurts. This article will try and help those who have been betrayed and learn how to get over it. There are some simple and worthwhile steps to take to help yourself learn to get over the betrayal. In many cases, it will affect you when the ones you thought once cared for you breaks your trust or confidence and causes conflict within the relationship. At that point, you think there is no going back. You feel as if the relationship is over and its lost forever.
Anyone who has been betrayed will know you go through a whirlwind of emotions, its almost as if your being touched by the different seasons. You’re angry at first then the anger subsides, then the questions set in and self-doubt. If your anything like me you will experience a feeling of darkness, life stands still, the light at the end of the tunnel keeps growing in distance. Laughing seems like a distance memory, those who betrayed you will never be apart of your life. They violated your trust they broke their promise. You may never be able to trust again because you never want to feel broken again.
HOW TO GET OVER IT
First thing is first please allow yourself to feel and absorb all those emotions, let them flow through you as if it’s like water. Don’t ever think for one second that you should keep them to yourself. Make sure you talk to someone it doesn’t matter who just talk and let you’re feeling out. I promise this will help in the long run. This will be hard to hear but once you are in control of your emotions the next few steps will help you immensely.
“Absorbs your emotions like they were water and let them flow through you”
Learn to let go of the pain and only way you can do this is by letting go (exactly the way Anna does in Frozen) seriously you have to LET IT GO. Do not let the pain take over your life. Try to be in control and do not let it win.
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal – the intend of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burnt” (Buddha)
The decision will be yours and only yours to make. Don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise. They didn’t go through it you did! Let go of the negative feelings it drags you down. Focus on yourself instead of the person who hurt you.
There is no time limit and pain like this will not just disappear on their own you have to work at it. Take each day at a time don’t rush. Digest all that you feel and then allow it to escape don’t hold on to it.
Its so easy to try and blame others but that I see as wasting your energy on a lost cause. It does not benefit you, it doesn’t change the situation. You can switch the focus from blaming others to understanding yourself.
Forgiveness is a really powerful skill, this is something that is taught and practiced. Its known that those who learn to forgive lead a happier and healthier life. I am still learning to forgive for something that happened over 17 years ago. I still struggle to come to terms with it as it affects me daily in one way or another. I wasn’t born with perfect social competence. Its challenging to choose positive emotions over negative ones.
I have learnt that you must live in the present it’s so easy to dwell on the past but learn to live in the here and now and enjoy what you have . Focus on the present, and leave it behind do not allow yourself to be clouded by the past.
“Switch the focus from blaming others to understanding yourself”
“I wasn’t born with perfect social competence. Its challenging to choose positive emotions over negative ones”
My aim of this was to help someone to understand that they are able to learn ways in which they can help themselves. It’s helped me and I wanted to do the same for you too. Please comment below and let me know what you think and if I helped at all in any shape or form. If there is anyone you know who may have suffered or is suffering and can benefit from this then please forward this to them.